Friday, 11 June 2010

A letter to the Reiki master

Colin Cobalt recently wrote to the fully qualified Reiki master, crystal healer, homeopath and certified Angel Therapist Practitioner Christina Moore:

Dear Christina,

Sorry I have not had the chance to write to you for the first time until now, but I was involved in an accident at work and my time has been taken up in trying to understand the court settlement.

Anyway, I have recently come into a little money and am looking to invest it in some Reiki and you came very highly recommended (second hit on Google - Congratulations!).  I have always felt I have a gift for healing and have noticed that people are very rarely ill when I am around.  My ultimate dream is to become a fully paid up professional Reikist, just like you!   I just have a few questions about the courses you run, and hopefully you can get a sense for the course that is best for me.

I see you offer to teach all levels of Reiki.  I do have a BSc(hons), so is it possible for me to move straight on to the Masters Degree?  I have plenty of transferable skills and came third in my class for my second year poster presentation.

Is it a problem that I recently lost a hand in a freak industrial accident?  I was trying to fix the aeration pump in tank 77 at the fish farm, but my hand became caught in the pump blades.  Luckily, I was used to the sight of large amounts of blood in the water from all the Salmon clubbing I had to do, or I would have been really distressed!  On the plus side, my other hand is absolutely fine, in fact, if it were an eye it would have 20-20 vision (I do wear glasses, however).  Should I be concerned about the 'high pressure hose pipe effect' of the healing energy as it leaves my stump?  Do I need to invest in a diffuser attachment?  Could you provide this through your Reiki suppliers, or could I fashion my own with material from a garden centre and some duct tape?

Strangely, my accident has led me to much more compassionate feelings towards fish and all other creatures of the deep.  I think I would have left my job anyway, even without the lawsuit.  Have you ever tried to heal fish with Reiki?  I once heard of a man who rendered a Portuguese man-o-war safe for children to handle using energised crystals and ear candles.  It is now being kept as a family pet.  I would love to be able to give something back to the fish community in recompense for the thousands I butchered and sent off to be minced into pies.  Could I incorporate an aquatic element into my studies?  Have you any experience in SCUBA Reiki?

When I gain my Reiki Masters degree, do you have any advice for setting up my own practice?  I could even use my monodextrous status as a unique selling point! 

I look forward to your response and to giving you my compensation payment in exchange for unlocking the secrets of your long lineage of Reikists.

Colin Cobalt BSc(hons)
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