Monday, 22 February 2010

Can't we just give Andreas Moritz and cancer a break?

Sometimes one is forced to stand up for the little man.  Those who keep up with the constant attacks on the character of honest alternative therapists, homeopaths, naturosociopaths, anasopaths and medical intuitives must be aware of the recent hate campaign against the wonderful therapist Andreas Moritz.

In the last week on the web, he has variously and apparently been described as: 'A quack', 'a cancer quack', 'a stupid, dangerous man', 'some schmuck', 'a crackpot', 'a cancer cures quack','an ignorant bullying woo-meister','Quack of the week','quack of the month','quack of the year','another bigtime quack','a dead-eyed, part-lizard future war criminal','one of the very worst things ever to come out of Germany','a shit','El Quacko the giant fucking quacking quack', 'the kind of manipulative, exploitative snake-oil peddler who should, if there is a shred of justice in this sad, cold world, be fed to sharks' and 'an evil, lying, poisonous fuck'.

The crime of this man that justified these brutal personal attacks?  Did he sell a homeopathic remedy that actually contained a single molecule of the active ingredient?  No.  Did he pass off a sugar pill without the requisite half-hour of sympathetic noises and gentle concern?  Nothing of the sort.  All he did was claim that cancer is not a disease, but rather a survival mechanism that we should be grateful to get.   Incidentally, this is the point of view of, at most,  84.673% of the population*.

Some of the points these miserable pedants saw fit to take issue with include:

1.Cancer is a desperate and final attempt by the body to stay alive.
2. Cancer does not attempt to kill the body; to the contrary, it tries to save it
3. Guilt and shame can easily paralyze the body's most basic functions, and lead to the growth of a cancerous tumor.
4. Cancer patients typically suffer from lack of self-respect or worthiness.
5 "Cancer does not cause a person to be sick; it is the sickness of the person that causes the cancer."

Who could possibly argue against the idea that cancer is actually a way of getting us to lead a more spiritual life and possibly buying more crystals, holy stones, plankton and ionic toothbrushes?  Furthermore, who can't see that it is basically our bad relationship with cancer that causes us to feel poorly?  Surely only someone who has an over-inflated ability to produce a complicated Excel spreadsheet!  You don't need years of medical training, a large double-blind testbed and gigabytes of clinical records to see that it JUST MAKES SENSE.  It is not even that he is saying anything particularly new, as this clip from a 2003 government think-tank shows...

 Why do all these people put down the man who is trying to make things a little better for us all?  Give the guy a break, go on, he has a lovely smile and a really neat beard.  While you're at it, just buy some of his products.  Go on, throw large wads of money in his bank account, it will relieve all that niggling, tumorous guilt and shame... buy his stuff... BUY IT NOW!!!!

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