Friday, 19 February 2010
The Incredible Water Vortex Magnetizer
I had to start this blog with one of the all time classics of homeopathic and isopathic remedy science: The literally incredible Water vortex magnetizer.
The critics and skeptics were quick to scoff: “It shows a complete lack of understanding of even the most basic concepts of Physics” they cried; “It is obvious to the most moon-faced schoolboy that you cannot reverse the polarity of hydrogen ions by pouring them from one bottle to another!” they bellowed; “What do you mean, it transfers its own natural vibrational imprint onto any water? It is just lies!”, they implored into the cold dark night, possibly standing in a little puddle of their own urine.
But how wrong the critics were! They were just not well-versed in the ground-breaking research of the very pre-eminent scientist Victor Schauberger, possibly because he eschewed publication in peer reviewed journals in order to maintain the purity of his science, and in turn the purity of his water. How anyone could fail to understand how pouring tap water past a magnet six times ‘at a high rate of speed’ renders it energized and structured, erased of any imprints of toxins or chemicals and imploded, with a reduced surface tension and inhibited bacterial growth, is frankly beyond me. And they are beyond help.
So convinced are the manufacturers of the Water Vortex Magnetizer that you will achieve amazing results, they have a ‘no returns or refunds’ policy on purchases, and at a miraculously cheap $36, why not buy one for everyone you know? While you are at it, why not lobby your MP to have the Water Vortex Magnetizer available on the NHS? Those of a technical bent may even wish to hijack the airwaves and broadcast their own home-made advert for the Water Vortex Magnetizer. There is also talk of a nationwide water boycott until all plumbers are required by law to fit a Water Vortex Magnetizer in every tap in the country. Don’t give up people, the re-patterning process has begun!
True art cuts deep... at the bleeding edge of science!